First day.

Here I am blogging on my phone at 1 am of 2.1.15. New year. Just another new day. Tho I must say im pretty excited bout 2015.

I didnt want to blog because I dont have the mobile blogger thing and I have to wake up early for work tomorrow. But as I lay here I realize im extrenely picky with people. Or thats what I think. Its actually rather hard for me to get close to people because I tend to flee when I feel like we don't click. Which explains how little friends I have. But I love them all and its amazing how great we clicked. Each and everyone one of them.

When I meet someone new I guess im friendly haha much confidence but as we talk and as I get to know you, if I somehow figure we wont click I literally back off,before we get any close,like I dont even know why.

I really miss my puchong friends and its soooooo hard to meet im dying. But first day of 2015 well spent with tmnt squad. I dont even know how we got this close,but im so amused and grateful. We just naturakly came together and I hope we last a long way.

Some of the photos we took today. Picture credits not mine of course.


Another thing I realize, technically quite long ago but just mentioning it now. Is that I don't need a lot of friends or clothes or branded stuff or a pretty face or a hella thin frame or a boyfriend. I just want to be happy. And let fate/nature do its thing. Because I strongly believe in fate heh. And I dont like forcing/hurrying into stuff or caring too much in those that I dont care. Hah I have no idea how to explain. But you get the point. Or nah. I am happy now with life and have been since pretty long ago and I love it and hope for it to be forever,which I have adequate amount of faith in.

I love people that give off good vibes and hope to bring good vibes to people as well. I have to mention this again but im absolutely thankful for all the people in my life. Still sticking by my side. Ill be by yours too. Lets live happily.

So I am writing this while choosing songs to put on here. I love this part. I have work tomorrow, it is twelve in the morning and I have so much on my mind lately I feel like I should revive this blog. Till' I come on here and typing actual shit I get sooooo lazy and don't feel like writing them anymore. Amazing.

Heading for Australia in less than 2 months?! Yes this is insane and this is actually happening. Going as an exchange student for only 6 months but I am hella hyped. I hope I didn't overestimate myself on this. I hope Australia makes me love it as much as I hope I would. I hope I meet new people, a lot of new people. I used to think i don't like people that much,which is rather still true,that explains why I don't go out every other night, I like the people that I like. However, I've grown to be really fascinated by people, by the way they act, by the kind and by the not-so. I've gotten myself out there since I got into uni I do stuff rather independently now I go to places alone now and the people that I've encountered are beyond sweet and I'm starting to really like people even the not so sweet ones. Another thing I am trying really hard not to judge people but i caught myself doing it unconsciously sometimes and wonder if it's human nature but anyways I am still working on it.

I am sooo into Kehlani lately she bout to be my main bae. She is so precious.

Yes hello this is a warning things get a lil more depressing over this one.
Do people actually get over deaths because if they do i must be doing it wrong because I don't think I can ever get over grandma's death like I miss her so much. Well its not those hardcore depression prone kind but it literally felt like she took a lil chunk of my heart with her like i actually feel the emptiness of the lil chunk and I was hoping it will kinda grow back like maybe it would pull some mitosis shit but its been 50 days and still no sign of that. The whole ritual is shady af and who for sure know what happen after death I literally have so many questions but I just really hope she is actually in a better place and is happy right now tho I would never know. I guess I just really need her existence and I kinda did not prepare self to go through people leaving me when I should. Its kinda funny how i thought that everyone would live longer than me hah.
I tried to recall what was the last thing she said to me and Im pretty sure she said "ok its enough,kar wai" in cantonese of course. Literally no one would call me kar wai in cantonese like she did anymore and I really need that.  So the story behind that was me rubbing her tummy for the air to get out or something like that, and it's been a while plus I was standing by her hospital bed,so i guess she thinks that I am tired so she asked me to stop.

Oh won't you look at that

Ahahahahaha guess this explained why the blog is called permanent writings instead of consistent writings. It's been pretty crazy how time passed though pretty sure its been a year? or more? ? ahahah I got in uni and stuff and even done with sem 1 , therefore, it feels right to come back here and write about everything again. SO, I'm here now at 4am too full on popcorn to sleep writing about stuff again.

Hmmm getting into uni is not the most nerve wrecking thing ever but its decent, there are a lot of good people and really nice experiences though on the other hand weekends do not feel like weekends and they have like long breaks in between exams such a torture. Plus its expensive as hell like wow not just monash like everywhere else too why does education cost so much. Anyways 1 sem down 5 more to go. Forget about that because hey I have like a whole month full of holidays and Adriadne is coming back soon so hell yeah but i feel like working too. Did i tell you I got a record player with my first ever earned salary? ahahha pretty crazy, but apparently i have to get a radio for it to actually work and now im using my parents really old wonky one. So I'm considering to get a job and get a new radio and heard that infinite is coming here again (fingers crossed). So yeah definitely need the money.

The start of my sem break has been insane midnight movies and more movies tomorrow because bro asked for it, and i think our family is pretty cool like we still go to movies with our parents. Maybe thats exactly the opposite of cool bc why am I still do that like Im a grown 18 year old pffft, but i think that its really cool that my parents put up with like stuff like these so I am grateful, though I know they are forced to /whispers/ brothers the king.

My car has been in a pretty bad condition as in I screwed up and hit and run and someone screwed up and pulled a hit and run on me too. Ok like hit and run is not exactly the right-est thing to do but at that time it was because it was a parked car and I have no idea what the hell am I suppose to do than to just hope that the person somehow could manage to find me so we could sort it out, but its been almost a month now and still no news I kinda felt guilty about it but I don't even know what I feel now.Maybe also partly because of someone did that to my car so i thought it was ok to do it to others as well but clearly not the best decision i made in life.


I hope I could get like 60% off my subjects this sem so i could actually apply to go to australia for 6 months next sem because I feel like it something that I should experience lmao sounds hella selfish but I want to try living in somewhere new without people that care about me. It would be hard though because people are hella racist and I can say this because I actually experienced it even as a tourist there so hah 2nd not so best decision in life?

I've been thinking and I kinda want to write it out here put i cant really put my thoughts into words maybe one day when i have great vocab and after my brain sorts itself out I would gladly lay out my thoughts here.


Maybe I should sleep its half past 4 AM god and I have to get up 4 hours later to fetch mum and did i mention I am the worst with directions ahahah one time tried coming back from one utama but went straight to kuala lumpur that was a hella rad one i must say.


GOODNIGHT.

Bye Bye

How ironic is it my previous post was titled hello and this is bye bye
But bye bye indeed
because im going to singapore
I've went there so many times,
I thought i wouldn't be excited for it anymore
but heck im rather excited ahahhaha
I can't wait to see my aunt and take loads of pictures


BUT THEN
I have to wake up at 4 am tomorrow..
omg whut first time waking up at 4
i told my dad i don't wanna sleep tonight
cause i dont think i could wake up at 4
even if zelo comes and wake me
ok wait zelo maybe i would
but wake up at 4 to sit in the car for 5 hours weeeeeps


Plus, I haven't even pack yet
ughhhh i hate packing
im so lazy
can clothes pack themselves i mean like
that would make my life hundred times easier


and can you believe that my dad said that we should go shopping
lmao first time ever he said that IM JUST



Im procrastinating here because i dont want to pack
but it's quater past nine already and i cant even
i gotta pack



so hope you guys have fun
enjoy your holidays if you have em :D
Bye see you when im homeee
Hopefully.



oh and finished 2 of john green's book
and i died like 2 times..
reminder ..not to read john green books one after another
i still have 2 more of his books
he is such a great writer
he made me think about so much stuff
I didnt really cried when i read looking for alaska
but holy shit the fault in our stars
I started crying 50 pages before it ended..
and after it ended,i just closed the book and laid on the floor
and continued sobbing
oh god i have not cried so much over a book gdi

Hello

Hello there..
It's been a while.
Loads happened ,obviously.
it's been more than a month.
i blame my on going laziness.
Anyways, I'm on sem break now.
so supposedly i would blog everyday ahahha but i did not.

My music is back holla.
but it's not the only thing that's back.
BROCCOLI IS BACK TOO.
i was wondering why is she back so fast..
and then i read her blog ahahha.
So you're going pahang now huh.
cryingg dump me all alone in selangor what is this.
I hope you enjoy yourself there tho
you probably will anyways ahhaha.

I'm going singapore next week i think.
I went to the passport renewal place yesterday.
and lemme tell you that it's not one bit fun.
but if you think that standing for 5 hours straight is fun
then its probably your cup of tea.
BUT ON THE PLUS SIDE
i renewed my passport..duhhh
and i read most of looking for alaska.
I couldve finish it there but i dont feel like it
i need a nice place to finish such a nice book ahahah


I wanted to find a job since i have like six weeks but then there's like trips planned
so i dont think anyone wants  a worker that takes leaves basically everyday
god of excuses = alicia



So i saved up money to see bap in singapore..
but i dont think its happening now
im going back before they are going to singapore.
this is one sad love story i know


I dont feel like going to singapore
i've went there sooo many times
but i miss my aunt so im going anyways
hahah what am i talking


ok so im going to stop here
i shall post soon
real soon.

asdfghjkl;

Do you know that feeling when you're stressed out by all the stuff that you have to do ,but you're still too lazy to do it. Shit.
Thats exactly me right now.
Next week is gonna be hell for me.
2 days of chem test.
1 day of math test.
Due date for bio report
My english oral presentation

IM LITERALLY GONNA DIE.

I havent even started my bio report and presentation slides.
Im hearing myself gradually decomposing.


Other than that..
I got my license like the first time..
omg without paying and stuff..
i was shocked..LOL.
but i still suck at parking without tiang now.
i need more practice so i wont dissapoint the examiner who gave me a pass.
And i drove to college today..
with dad.
HOLY SHIT.
THAT HIGHWAY SHIT IS INTENSE.
AND ROUNDABOUTS TOO.
so damn scary.
My hands was literally shaking and sweating and cold..
like i was still shaking after i reach college.
And got honked by people LOL.
mean people mean.


well i wished my bio teacher is like ms charity..
like ms charity gave guidelines and a sample report for us to do ..
since its new to us.
but my bio teacher just expect us to do it by ourselves.
WHERE IS THE LOGIC AT.
crieees i dont know how to start this report and im gna die.


thats why its like eleven now and i feel like going to sleep so i dont need to think about it anymore.
I NEED TO FINISH THESE FAST
LEGIT CRIES.

oh an my glasses caused allergies thingy came back and it sucks.
i need to wear contacts for like a whole day now.
and NO.
i hate it ..
but i have too waills.



Goodnight peeps.
broccoli is gone so i doubt anyone will read my blog now so yeah..
basically typing for myself to read ahahah
ok bai.